


But I Always Will Remember

by ruggedbrilliance



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-14
Updated: 2013-05-14
Packaged: 2017-12-11 20:07:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/802707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruggedbrilliance/pseuds/ruggedbrilliance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry always seems to get upset while singing Summer Love, looking like he's trying not to cry. This is the reason.</p>
            </blockquote>





	But I Always Will Remember

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever 1D fanfic and is based on this video of Harry looking upset while singing Summer Love: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVKeKZOI0b4. Dedicated to whywouldieverpushlouisoffthebed (Amber) on tumblr! 
> 
> This is completely and totally a work of fiction, written only for fun, no disrespect to any real people intended.

Harry knew it was next in the set list, but he still flinched when he heard the gentle guitar play the opening chords of “Summer Love”. After all this time it still got to him, and as he sat down and waited for his cue to sing he took several deep, shuddering breaths to try and calm himself. He sniffed, feeling the tears welling up, and he knew the crowd would notice, but he couldn’t help it. The only thing that kept his tears from falling was looking across the stage at Louis as he opened his mouth to sing.

****

Louis scowled, watching Harry suffer through his solo and trying to keep himself together. He was doing a shit job of it, but then again, Harry had always been a terrible actor. That was Louis’ job. So he dutifully wiped the frown from his face and sent a cheeky smile in Niall’s direction. But he couldn’t help where his thoughts took him as he lifted his mic to sing.

****

_Two Years Earlier_

****

Harry was positively beaming. He couldn’t stop fidgeting as he waited excitedly for Louis to arrive. They almost never went out, they were trying to keep a low profile while they worked on their album. Since losing the X Factor they had been taking some time to really solidify their sound and figure out the type of band they wanted to be. It was September now, and they were finally going to release their first album in November.

****

This last summer had been the best of Harry’s life, mostly because he had gotten to spend it with the boy he loved. He and Louis had developed a close friendship in the X Factor house, with increasingly escalating flirtations that finally came to a head the night before the finale, when Louis desperately grabbed Harry and kissed him like he was afraid it was his last chance.

****

It wasn’t his last chance; it was only the beginning of their whirlwind romance. They spent the next few months in each others’ arms at night and failing at subtlety during the day. The rest of the boys knew, it was impossible to keep it from them, and they were supportive (if a little annoyed by the constant PDA). They were trying to keep it from management, but they had been getting increasingly suspicious looks lately. Harry didn’t care, he was happy with Louis and that’s all that mattered.

****

Speaking of which, his smile stretched even wider as he saw his boyfriend coming towards the table. Harry stood up for a hug, but Louis had already taken his seat. His smile looked strained and didn’t quite reach his eyes, but Harry figured he was probably just tired from their extremely busy schedule.

****

“Hi babe, how was the rest of your day?” Harry asked.

****

“What? Oh, yeah, it was fine I guess.” Louis said.

****

Ok, now Harry was worried, something was definitely bothering Lou, he never gave such short and snappy answers, at least not to Harry. He reached across the table and covered the smaller boy’s hand with his own, hoping to comfort him, but Louis just slid his hand away and into his lap.

****

“Lou? Is everything ok?” he asked, frowning in concern.

****

“Yeah, yeah everything is...well, I mean, I talked to management today. They called me after you had left. They...” Louis shaked his head slightly, and seemed to reset himself. All of a sudden his patented cheeky grin was in place, and it was clear he was trying for carefree but he still looked a little stiff.

****

“Anyway, that doesn’t matter.” He smiled, but rather than the warmth Harry was used to from Louis’ smiles, this one sent a bolt of something cold through his stomach. “What I meant to say was, well, we’ve been having fun right Harry? This has been fun.”

****

Harry furrowed his brow further at the rapid change of subject and mood. He wasn’t sure what Louis wanted him to say, so he spoke even slower than usual when he answered. “Yeah love, we’re having fun. I always have fun with you. What’s up, Lou? You’re worrying me a bit.”

****

Louis laughed, but it sounded pained. “No worries babe, I’m perfectly fine. It’s just, I wanted you to know that there’s nothing that I wanna change, yeah? I wish...I mean, if we could just rewind and do it all again that’d be great.”

****

Harry’s heart started pounding. What was Louis saying? It couldn’t be what it sounded like...it couldn’t. “Lou...Louis what are you saying huh? We don’t need to rewind anything ok? We’ve got all the time in the world.”

****

“Harry, please,” Louis was no longer looking Harry in the eye, instead looking down to where he was fidgeting with his cutlery. “please don’t make this any harder. It’s just...we can’t take this any farther.”

****

There was a buzzing in Harry’s ears. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His hands began to shake as he reached out and grabbed Louis’ hand with both of his, clutching tightly. “What are you saying? Why are you saying this? Louis, stop this, don’t do this. Louis, I lo--”

****

Louis cut him off, his voice breaking when he practically yelled, “Don’t! Don’t say that word, please. Don’t look at me that way, Haz. We had a good time, yeah? The best time. And I won’t forget all we had. But...it’s over now, ok? It has to be over.”

****

The tears were falling steadily down Harry’s face now. He couldn’t breathe, his head was spinning and he felt like he was going to be sick. And the worst part was, he knew Louis. He could see that he was lying, that he didn’t really want it to be over either, and Harry didn’t understand why he was doing this. But before he could even compose himself enough to speak, to beg and plead and maybe scream, Louis was pulling his hand out of Harry’s death grip and standing.

****

“I...I should probably get going actually, early day tomorrow and all that. Don’t take this too hard, please Haz, we’re still mates right? We’ve still got the band and the lads, it’ll be fine, you’ll see.” He grimaced as he looked at how hysterical Harry was. For a second, his eyes softened and Harry could see his own pain mirrored back at him. Louis looked like he wanted to reach out, even took an aborted step forward before he pulled away and took a step back. “It’s for the best, Harry. I’m sorry.”

****

Harry watched the boy he loved walk away from him, and he sat alone in the restaurant and cried.

****

_Present Day_

****

The boys were backstage now and Harry still felt shaken from having to sing Summer Love. Not for the first time, he wished that Niall, Zayn and Liam hadn’t been so adamant that it was perfect for their second album. But he couldn’t blame them; they had no idea that it reminded him of the worst night of his entire life.

****

Suddenly there were arms wrapped around his middle from behind and he was pulled against a smaller body. He turned in Louis’ arms and embraced him tightly, burying his face in his neck and breathing him in. Louis ran his fingers soothingly through his hair. “Oh Haz,” he said with a sigh.

****

“I hate that stupid song, Lou.” came Harry’s muffled reply. Louis laughed.

****

“Babe, you don’t hate that song, we helped _write_ that song. I’m sorry it always brings back bad memories. But you do remember that we were only broken up for a week before I came running back, crying like a baby and begging for your forgiveness, yeah?” He was trying to make Harry laugh, but he only whined and clutched him tighter.

****

“Don’t _talk_ about it Lou! Worst week of my entire life, I thought I was going to _die_ without you!”

****

“Oh babe, you’re so dramatic. Well I obviously couldn’t live without you either.” He pulled back and held Harry’s face in his hands. “I’ll never be able to tell you how sorry I am. I was an absolute prat for ever thinking it’d be easier with us apart.  But I can tell you that I will never, ever let you go again. I love you, Harry Styles.” He pressed a gentle kiss to his boyfriend’s lips and then pulled him into a hug once more.

**  
**Harry smiled into the embrace. “Love you too, Louis.”


End file.
